That Floating Poo Was Way Too Symbolic! It's the Television Letdowns of the Year.

Looking back, we consider the television offerings of the past year, a handful of shows stand out not for their brilliance, but for their spectacular shortcomings. Ranging from cringe-inducing sequels to confusingly bad documentaries, here are the programmes that left us utterly bewildered or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Burdened with woeful scripts, cringe-inducing character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show fought to justify its existence. Briefly, as the third series started, it seemed as if it had at last found its groove. Then arrived an installment all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner announced this would be the final series. It ended on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s loo full of poo was simply too symbolic. Yet, viewers undeniably found joy picking apart every single “what on earth?” episode. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a small sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was practically the smallest of this show's problems. The subject of a very rare zero star assessment, it was difficult to know where to begin listing the problems. The laughably wooden dialogue? The mind-numbing veneration of affluence and consumption? The seemingly deliberate parade of cliches? Acting so bad they felt almost spiteful? Suffice it to say “all of the above” and never speak of this show again. Except, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Considering the legal troubles, abuse allegations and parental shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d truly have gleaned it from this multi-part documentary which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive excess while struggling to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any pity this show might induce should be saved for the people who have had to suffer proximity with this charming but dismissive narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we understood it was preposterous from the outset: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure admiration for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

MobLand

Shady characters meeting in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its gangland drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to indulge baffling accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney rogues which felt a bit basic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the extent to which she provokes the ire of certain ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s temptingly easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into twee homemaking as deliberate statements. But then you watch them and are forced to concede that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle catalogue come to life; a meme for evening drinks with delusions of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, humming beehives, Hallmark sayings and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by vast, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are clearly fascinating things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this three-part series chose not to say them. Instead, the experience was like consuming a marketing brochure. She obviously has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But unfortunately, she didn’t do herself any favours with this cagey non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It had the potential to be the next big hit – except even camper, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality managing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As players battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to detail what precisely was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up smelling of a production that was trying way too hard to live up to something far greater than it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How does one succeed a show that captured a generation? The expectation was enormous for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of celebrity cameos involved felt uncomfortable.

The Sketch Show Return

Not good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the smart inclusion of gifted younger comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A particular sketch was a single joke stretched to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an compelling drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right voice, lumbering from strangely jaunty, somewhat stylised farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Perhaps. A complete mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We love the lead actor … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could ruin society? Nope! This globe-trotting thriller about government agencies spying on – and killing off – academics honestly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This hagiography followed the content creator notorious for explicit escapades as she undertook her most extreme feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was far greater examination of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who showed up to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was disturbing shots and absolutely no critical analysis of her infamy whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.